Virtual Infidelity: Is Cheating with an AI Girlfriend Considered Adultery?

By: Carolyn Potts

Her, a film about a man who falls in love with a virtual assistant, was released in 2013.[1] When the movie came out, virtual affairs may have seemed like science fiction, but now, twelve years later, “virtual infidelity” has become a harsh reality for a growing number of couples. For many people, Artificial Intelligence (“AI”) is seen as a tool to answer questions or to manage tasks, but for some, it provides a sense of romantic companionship. Platforms generating AI girlfriends are experiencing a massive growth in popularity, with millions of users.[2] While most of these searches are initiated by young single men, many users engaging in relationships with AI chatbots are married to real life people.[3] The recent rise in AI love affairs begs the question, how do these virtual relationships factor in to divorce cases?

While infidelity can be either emotional or physical[4], divorce law in most states today defines adultery as sexual contact or sexual intercourse between a married person and a person who is not their spouse.[5] Does a romantic relationship with an AI chatbot fall under this legal definition? Many courts are reluctant to recognize purely digital infidelity as adultery in the legal sense.[6]

For instance, in Keeler v. Keeler, the court held that the Plaintiff’s adultery allegations lacked sufficient information as to the time, place, and circumstances of any sexual encounter between the Defendant and a supposed paramour when the Plaintiff used evidence of sexually explicit images and email exchanges found on the Defendant’s user account on the family computer as evidence.[7] While digital evidence such as e-mails, text messages, or social media direct messages could be evidence to prove adultery, these forms of evidence must show that a spouse engaged in physical intercourse with the other party.[8]

Because people cannot engage in physical relationships with their AI girlfriends, it is unlikely that this type of virtual infidelity would constitute sufficient grounds for a divorce based on adultery. With the rise of these digital relationships, however, courts are forced to determine how AI cheating affects divorce proceedings.

Los Angeles family courts now see three to five AI infidelity cases weekly.[9] Artificial intelligence relationships are causing significant rifts, tearing apart marriages, not only emotionally, but also financially.[10] For instance, one Brentwood venture capitalist spent $2,700 monthly on emotionally intimate conversations with his AI companion.[11] In community property states like California, money earned and spent during the marriage generally belongs to both spouses.[12] While emotionally intimate contact with a chatbot does not constitute adultery, the use of significant funds on AI chatbot services can be viewed as marital waste, or a misuse of marital resources, which can impact property division.[13] The depth of AI connections could also impact custody decisions in cases where the digital relationships affect a parent’s ability to show up for their children.[14]

As AI becomes more pervasive in our lives, courts must adapt to address the novel issues arising from emotional connections with virtual entities. This includes potentially re-evaluating traditional definitions of infidelity as well as considering the real-life consequences it can have on marriages and families, whether virtual or real.[15]

 

Link to image source:

https://www.pexels.com/photo/code-projected-over-woman-3861969/

 

[1] Scott D. Haltzman, Defining Infidelity in the Age of Artificial Intelligence, Psychology Today (Jan. 29, 2025), https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/surviving-infidelity/202501/defining-infidelity-in-the-age-of-artificial-intelligence.

[2] Susan B. Trachman, The Dangers of AI-Generated Romance, Psychology Today (Aug. 18, 2024), https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/its-not-just-in-your-head/202408/the-dangers-of-ai-generated-romance.

[3] See id.

[4] Haltzman, supra note 1.

[5] See Douglas E. Abrams, et. al., Contemporary Family Law 576 (6th ed. 2023).

[6] Adultery and Divorce in Virginia, Livesay & Myers, https://www.livesaymyers.com/adultery/.

[7] Keeler v. Keeler, 80 Va. Cir. 205 (2010).

[8] Proving Adultery in Virginia – Getting a Fault-Based Divorce in VA, The Law Offices Of Daniel J. Miller (Aug. 26, 2021), https://www.legaldefense.com/legal-blogs/2021/august/proving-adultery-in-virginia-getting-a-fault-bas/#:~:text=It’s%20especially%20important%20to%20note,of%20adultery%20allegations%20and%20cases.

[9] A.I. Infidelity Evidence: Digital Betrayal & Divorce Cases, Hayat Family Law (June 2, 2025), https://hayatfamilylaw.com/a-i-infidelity-evidence-digital-betrayal-divorce-cases/.

[10] See id.

[11] Id.

[12] AI Partner Divorce: Is Virtual Infidelity Real in Divorce?, Yang Law, https://yanglawoffices.com/ai-partner-divorce-virtual-infidelity/#:~:text=When%20one%20partner%20diverts%20significant%20funds%20toward,at%20the%20broader%20impact%20on%20the%20relationship.

[13] See id.

[14] See id.

[15] See id.